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The Coffee Shop Coach - 5 StepsTwo men sat in a coffee shop. One of them, Richard, was looking considerably happier than when he entered. He dug around in his briefcase while the other man sipped at his coffee.
Soon Richard produced a palm pilot and prodded it with enthusiasm. "Let's make another appointment," he said. "Then we can figure out how I solve my business problem and get my career in order." The other man had been telling Richard about the benefits of coaching, and Richard saw how it could turn his life around.
"Slow down a bit there," said Coach. "I'm glad you're excited. But now that you know the benefits of coaching, it would be helpful to know the process too. There's a process good coaches must take their clients through - one involving analysis of your circumstances, goals, and values as well as a strategy for achieving them. You discover the behaviors that influence your choices and the philosophy that will get you where you want to be."
Richard frowned. "How is any of that relevant right now? I realize coaching can be applied to a lot more than business, but I want to start changing my life by fixing my business problem first?don't I?"
"Coaches can't help you get the life you truly want by just dispensing advice and handing you a new goal. It'd be like dropping you in a huge city you've never been to before, giving you directions to a particular Starbucks, but not telling you where you're starting from." Coach tapped his finger in the middle of a napkin. "I'd be handing you a map with the 'You Are Here' missing."
He paused to take a sip of his coffee before continuing. "I go through a five-step coaching process. The first thing I'd do for you as a coach is show you where you're at-step one. Awareness always precedes change. When you're struggling to get that clear, unbiased view of the challenges you face in life, your coach helps you clarify the issues and gain the perspective you need. You learn much more than what's wrong with the immediate situation. You look at your life as a whole and figure out what's holding you back from maximizing your potential."
Richard nodded. "Okay, that makes sense. What's the next step?"
"Step two of the process is discovering who we are and who we want to become as a person. We create direction in our lives when we define our values, goals, mission, vision, and purpose.
Try seeing it this way. Say you've found that perfect Starbucks. It has the best atmosphere, and you like the staff. The prep counter has the condiments arranged just right. But what is it that you like about the atmosphere, the service, and the arrangement- Understanding why you gravitate to these features will let you recognize things you like about coffee shops in general. In a bigger sense, it lets you recognize the things that make you feel fulfilled."
Coach took another sip and continued. "Your values, goals, mission, and vision come from knowing what you want out of life. This is the most important part of step two: it lets you establish purpose for your life. Richard frowned again. "That sounds pretty big-'purpose for your life.' My purpose is to achieve my goals."
"A coach wants you to see it differently-because purpose is much more significant, fundamental, and inspiring than that. For example, as you've been analyzing your passion for coffee shops, you discover that you want to start your own coffee shop, one even better than your favorite Starbucks. There's a goal.
Through this process I will help you link your goals to purpose so they can last for the long term for a goal is only a marker or milestone along the way."
Coach took a business card and began writing on the back. "Here's something I remind my clients of when I follow up on their action plans. If you take anything from our meeting today, it should be this." He pushed the card across the table. On it was written:
Goals are external. Purpose is within us. Goals are milestones. Purpose is everlasting. Goals leave you thirsty. Purpose is happiness.
Richard took the card and read it. "Once you know your purpose," Coach continued, "you easily complete step three, which is finding out our future desires."
Looking up, Richard asked, "Haven't we already discovered that in step two? What we want out of life?"
A coach's job is to steer their clients toward this desired lifestyle, help set goals for getting there, and then empower them to complete the action plan they've created."
"Yeah, you said something about action plans before," said Richard. "I take it that's when I work out how to reach my goals?"
"Exactly," replied Coach. "That's step four: becoming responsible for your desires through an action plan. Your coach helps you create a strategy for achieving those specific goals you've developed in step three. Not only that, your coach helps you implement your strategy, addressing the obstacles and helping you through the fear and discomfort of making changes. We will support you through direction, encourage you to visualize your passion and assist you in obtaining your purpose.
Richard, who had been squirming at the mention of action plans, raised his eyebrows.
"That doesn't sound too bad," he said.
Coach nodded and continued. "And that support carries over to the very last step: following up. Like I said, we're with you in making this exciting transition into a more satisfying life. It makes sense-if we're both going to the trouble of creating an action plan, we want to make sure it actually happens. I would be checking on your progress and guiding you throughout the process."
Richard sat back and gave a low whistle. "Again, wow. I had no idea coaching was so in-depth."
"It is. And many highly successful people hire a coach with the goal of gaining an extra edge to attain success in a competitive world." Coach folded his hands on the table. "Do you think this is something you'd be interested in?"
"Let's make that next appointment," said Richard.
Five steps of coaching:
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